Why I Like to Build Up Others, Not Tear Them Down

I have a policy for my life that may seem odd, but I don't believe I should measure my accomplishments by any negative things I've done. Sounds obvious, but I include all acts of destruction in that definition, and since some things are bad that need destroyed like a termite-infested house that is torn down for being a hazard, it sounds strange that I would not include an act of destruction done for positive and beneficial reasons on my list of accomplishments.

Now, I never tore down a condemned building, that was just an example, but I always have venerated those who create over those who destroy because destruction is easy, both of things and of people.

Not everyone can write a book, but it takes far less effort to burn one. Not every person can talk a suicidal person off a ledge, but it's much easier to drive them to it. And to be more specific, everyone can tear down and demean others, but not everyone can build others up.


As a Christian, I found even the Bible strongly encourages us to consider doing what we can to build others up, and here's some of the logic they use:

(my comments in bold, originals in italics)

Hebrews 10:25 ESV 

Not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. 


The logic for this is simple. One day, we will all be judged for what we've done, and the more time we spent building each other up, the better we will be regarded at that time of judgment.

Romans 15:2 ESV 

Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. 


The logic of this is that uplifting your neighbor is to their benefit, and vice versa if they do the same for you. As something for your benefit can only help, it only makes sense to encourage more statements done for the benefits of others.

Galatians 6:2 ESV 

Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. 


This is key to what Jesus wants of us. He was willing to suffer and die for us, so if He could do it for all humanity, we should be able to do so for one another because he was able to suffer for our sake first.

Ephesians 4:31-32 ESV 

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. 



This is why tearing others down is bad. Jesus came to forgive, not condemn, and he did so because in that was our redemption. And if we choose to forgive and expect redemption instead of condemnation, we emulate the same example He showed in regards to giving us mercy. Showing hate and contempt only pushes people away from improving and being redeemed of whatever wrongs they may be guilty of, hence why all should do the opposite.

Proverbs 10:11 ESV 

The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence. 



More on the dark side of tearing others down. People who do that are destroyers of others, they want to see others broken, unredeemed, and unregenerate, and there is no hope in that result. Only by being someone who encourages others is there a promise of a better life here and beyond.

Proverbs 12:26 ESV 

One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray. 



 A followup. Those who want to tear down others want to watch them become worse as people because they desire to see the worst in others, which does no good to any of the parties concerned. Only through building up others can we avoid becoming worse in the long run as people.

Proverbs 17:17 ESV 

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. 


Someone who truly cares won't wish evil and suffering on you, and those who are as brothers to you are those who don't get their kicks in watching your pain but rather would see you do better.

John 13:34-35 ESV 

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” 


This is an official Jesus command for us. If we act as he did and love others like he loved us, we show we follow His will, not our own, and since His will is to see us be raised up alongside our fellow man instead of torn down, there is no good reason to not do this.

John 3:16-17 ESV 

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. 


The crux of why we should bother building up others. God sent his Son to raise us up because he loved us. If God could do that for us, we are not above or unable to do the same in gratitude. 


I just want to conclude this by saying I consider every person I build up to raise higher than they stand before I encouraged them to be the things I'm truly proud of, because it's His Will that says I am to uplift others so that I will be uplifted in turn. However, do not do this for praise before Men, but only do this for the praise of He who can uplift all Men, because in the end, that's the only way we can all truly rise and be built up into better people.