Thursday, October 13, 2016

Keijo!!!!!! - The Anime that Kotaku Spilled Spaghetti Over And My Rebuttal

Recently Kotaku published a whiny as hell article about a new anime called "Keijo!!!!!!!", a sports anime based off a manga of the same name, all because of it's unusual premise, a sport based on women using their T&A to play a variation of that "Butt Bounce" minigame from the Dead Or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball series (another series those idiots wailed and moaned about).

Since anything they whine about turns out to be not half as bad as they claim, I decided to check it out.

The first episode begins with a keijo competition underway, and the rules are as follows:

* Everyone competes on "The Land", a floating platform in a pool, and only feet are allowed to touch it during play. All other body parts are immediate dis-qualifiers.
** There are narrow pontoon bridges they must cross to compete on one of the floating "Land" platforms, falling off is also an immediate dis-qualifier.
* The idea is for all competitors (women only) to be the only one left, and they can only knock other competitors off using their boobs and butts only (they must be used offensively to push the other competitors off)

Simple enough, really, and faintly ridiculous on paper, but as the show depicts, it actually takes a bit of skill to keep your balance and use chest and hip thrusts to propel your breasts and backside as beaters to knock the other competitors off, and they depict it as a serious sport.

And yes, while it's definitely got some fanservice, Kotaku's Cecilia D'Anastasio seems to have just watched just enough of the show to get offended and write a hit piece, since she ends with some scornful summary that it reduces women to pieces of meat and that people should be ashamed to watch it.

First off, allow me to offer a rebuttal, having watched it myself.

As depicted, it requires intense coordination and balance to succeed at this sport, like any other IRL sport. And let's be fair, the T&A only limitation puts even MORE emphasis on how much skill is needed to succeed at this depicted sport, since to even use either body part to launch an attack means sacrificing some balance, so it's a calculated decision made on the fly to go on the offensive, and even playing on the defensive is difficult since it's a floating platform with all the risks that entails, and that's without even getting into fending off other people trying to knock you off.

So, in essence, this is not just a T&A show with fanservice as the only goal, it's kinda relevant to the fictional sport being depicted since the women involved can only used those body parts in an offensive role, much like how one can only use their feet in soccer.

As for the plot being thin, well no shit, it's a show about a girl who wants to be the best she can be at the sport (and more power to her, and I would think a woman could appreciate a story with female empowerment as a theme), they admit up front the plot is simple, and there is nothing wrong with a thin plot in this type of genre because the main action is the sports action, and that doesn't require writing an uber-intricate plot for.

However, the main gripe here seems to be it's a fanservice show, that's bad, and any American who watches it should feel bad if they like it, and the unstated but obvious addendum the Japanese should have been ashamed to produce it.

 To that, I have this rebuttal:

Cecilia D'Anastasio, you are entitled to your opinion, I will not dispute that, but here's my opinion on your opinion.

You are not an arbiter of public morality, and you never will be. So long as the medium is legal to produce, watch, and acquire, people will indulge themselves in it if happens to strike their fancy and there is nothing you can do about it. If Americans (like myself) enjoy it, well I don't give a shit if you complain about me liking it and since I first heard of it thanks to you, you have my ironic thanks for introducing me to something I find somewhat amusing and entertaining based as much on the merit of the fictional sport depicted as I do the women who bust their ass looking good while playing it. In fact, these women are working to keep their bodies in shape in an intensely competitive sport, so I'd expect they'd look good, and if you think I'm deplorable for liking to watch athletic women looking good while engaging in a sports activity, then so be it, I could care less.

And finally, while it's not said outright, you are basically complaining the Japanese even made it, and on the behalf of the creator, I'm offended you hate their creation simply because it offends your culturally myopic morality, so I recommend you not watch it if it offends you so greatly, no one has or ever will put a gun to your head and force you to do so, especially not the Japanese creators who were kind enough to allow and encourage other cultures to enjoy the merits of their artistic creations.


  1. So its hands-free Sumo on water.

  2. "So long as the medium is legal to produce, watch, and acquire, people will indulge themselves in it if happens to strike their fancy and there is nothing you can do about it."

    Guess they'll just have to find a way to make it illegal, then, and don't you doubt that they will.

  3. Please, keep it going, we need more non-sjw bloggers. The blogging community is FILLED with SJWs.

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